Finding myself in John Lewis on a Saturday afternoon in late October, there was nothing else for it. I would have to refrain from tearing down the Christmas decorations in a fit of rage (Christmas decorations! It’s October for God sakes!), and head for the chocolate section instead.
I came home with a selection of orangey chocolates, including these. I have to admit to being primarily attracted to the shiny tin they came in, but didn’t have much of an idea of what to expect from Kshocolât.
The paper sleeve that keeps the tin closed informs me these are “A fabulous after dinner treat” and “Perfect for dinner parties”. At this point, I was starting to get a little worried. I’m always wary of chocolate that tells me how I should eat it. Then came the killer blow:
Kshocolat Ltd. Suite 64 Glasgow G51 3TR.
I may be biased, but both the “Suite 64″ and “Glasgow” bits worry me. My concerns were magnified when I finally opened the tin:
Inside, we have eight slices of crystalised orange covered rather haphazardly with chocolate. I have to say I was disappointed, both by the quantity and quality on display here. I’d paid £6.50 (around $13.50) for this 100g tin.
My disappointment was just confirmed when I bit into one of these orange slices. The chocolate, while very thick, is decidedly tasteless. At 45% cocoa solids, I wasn’t expecting much, but this has none of the distinct bitterness of real dark chocolate, and was more akin to Cadbury’s cheapo Bournville.
Even the orange pieces themselves didn’t have much flavour. They were very chewy and quite sweet, but not particularly orangey. Which is a bit weird considering they’re simply slices of real orange.
There’s nothing offensive here. It’s just a decidedly average product masquerading as something posh. And that’s my real issue with this. A Scottish company with a nonsensical and unpronounceable name charging £6.50 for 8 small slices of orange and a tin that’s only really useful if I decide to store more small slices of orange of my own.
I really hate to have to slam a British chocolate company, but this is probably the worst value chocolate I’ve tasted. Ever. It’s a cheap, average product dressed up in fancy packaging and given a price that reflects the packaging, not the product itself.
Kshocolât’s slogan at the bottom of the paper sleeve is “The best way to understand is to experience“. Well here at Chocablog, we have a slogan too: “We buy this crap so you don’t have to“.