Filthy Chocolate – Kinky Crème Brûlée Bites

Posted by in Chocolate Reviews on December 27 2007 | Leave A Comment
Kinky Crème Brûlée Bites

I spotted these in Sainsbury’s the other day and having enjoyed Lindt’s Creme Brulee chocolate so much I decided to have a try.

Filthy Chocolate are obviously selling themselves as a slightly naughty, decadent brand and their website is definitely aimed at reinforcing that perception, with it’s movies of bondage, chocolate being dripped on bare flesh and so forth. Even the stickers holding the box together are extolling the virtues of naughtiness…

Filthy Chocolate

Anyway, however you choose to play with your food, what we want to know is whether or not the product actually tastes good.

I have to say that I liked the form of the packaging. As you remove the lid, the box opens out like some sort of Cubist flowers, revealing the contents nesting in sellophane.

Kinky Creme Brûlée Bites

The ‘premium brand’ perception is further reinforced by the number of chocs in the box. £5 for 12 Creme Brulee Bites isn’t cheap by anyone’s standards (that’s 41p per bite!) so I was expecting great things from Filthy already.

That’s where it all went wrong. After all the hype, the anticipation, the build up, and the promise of decadent indulgence, these little bites turned out to be filled with a light, soft mousse-like filling, and it was all over in seconds. It was like fancying the pants of someone, having them flirt outrageously with you, promising you all manner of naughtiness, and then when it comes to the crunch what you get is amateurish, unsatisfyling and ultimately disappointing. How very sad.

Kinky Creme Brûlée Bites

I’m afraid I have to say that I think Filthy have spent far too much attention on their web site, branding and image and far too little on what really counts, which is good quality, great tasting product. The chocolate is okay, but the filling is about as substantial as a cloud.

On the base of the box is a note which says if the product falls short of expectations then you should be hard on them, and that they’d like that. Well chaps, here’s a sound spanking from Uncle Simon. I expect better next time.


Comments On This Post

  1. i think the brand name is sort of like a bad choice…
    imagine someone saying :”do you want some of my filthy chocolate?”
    the chocolate does not look very attractive either.

  2. Rachel

    We had some of these in the office today (caramel). They were AWFUL! Could not believe they’re a fiver a box!

  3. I would be very careful about what you do since shompoaing may cause mildew/mold to grow because the water will seep deep down into the mattress where it can not dry (the dampness will turn to mildew and smell). If there are areas of visible dirt, then I would just lightly surface clean w/ a damp (not wet) sponge and some stain remover made for upholstery. If there’s no stains that you can see, but you just want to remove invisible dirt, dust mites, and skin flakes (from person who slept w/o the sheet) then just a good vacumming w/ the upholstery attachment on your vacume should take care of it. If you still think it is dirty, then maybe you would consider a professional steam cleaning. Look up cleaners in your phone book. Perhaps carpet steaming business can recommend something. In the future you can buy a mattress pad/cover sold at all stores, such as walmart, kmart, jcpenny, ect. It will keep the mattress clean, in the event that someone decides to sleep w/o making the bed. And you can just throw it in the washing machine every couple of weeks. I use a special one that inhibits allergens, since I have bad allergies to everything. I got mine at walmart. Also, it will hide any previous dirt or dust mites that may have been on the mattress from the past.Good Luck,AngieExperienced RN

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