One of the most disappointing reactions anyone can have after looking forward to their daily (for me) or weekly chocolate treat is to snap off a few squares, let it swirl around the mouth for a few moments before dismissively grunting, “Meh”.
Perhaps my hopes should have been much lower to start with. Firstly, it’s a supermarket ‘own brand’ of chocolate and secondly it’s in a wrapper makes the product look about as appealing as an ingrown toenail removal. This is not the kind of chocolate you can take to a friend’s house to share and hope to receive a warm welcome. Usually, such products are made by a more well-known commercial enterprise as a bit of an earner on the side, but when I contacted Woolworths, I was told that they weren’t allowed to tell me the manufacturing firm because it was “commercially sensitive.”
Okaaaaay, so “Commercially Sensitive” might be a more tactful code word for ‘Second Rate’ or ‘Company Rejects’ because this stuff is bland, bland bland. Despite having sugar as the number one ingredient, followed by the expected almonds, full cream milk powder and cocoa mass and consisting of 33% cocoa solids (which isn’t bad for milk chocolate), there was no impact on the taste buds when a square or four was sampled.
The almonds inside were nice and crunchy, but the chocolate covering them was impossible to taste. Frantic chewing, slow sucking, gentle melting, serving at room temperature, nothing helped to bring out any distinct flavour. It might as well have been sugarless carob for all of the impact and enjoyment it provided, and no, that’s NOT a compliment. AVOID.