Deanna and I may be on different continents, but we both came across these ‘Emergency Chocolates’ from Bloomsberry at the same time. Deanna picked up the dark version and I found the milk chocolate version. So here’s both our reviews in one handy, pocket-sized emergency post.
Deanna’s Review: Dark Chocolate
I’ve been seeing these little boxes around a lot, but I knew that under the smiling cover, it would be no better than average. Which is sad because it could really be pretty entertaining.
“For immediate relief of: Chocolate Cravings, Lovesickness, Exam Pressure, Mild Anxiety, and Extreme Hunger.”
I let my hopes go up just slightly at the wrapper inside, then started suspiciously eyeing the yellow “gold” wrapper underneath. The twelve big rectangles smell sweet. . . and very unpromising. They taste. . . horrible. That’s really the only word. Hideously sweet in the worst way and synthetic and gross.
Hence the name. You’d only eat it in an emergency when you have no other options. Even then. . . well, I guess it’ll partially satisfy your chocolate cravings if you really are desperate. Trapped under a radioactive bombed city for a score of years. Because there’s no reason I’d pay for the box when the chocolate inside is no good. These people have a wide range, but they’re obviously not putting the attention where it needs to go.
Dom’s Review: Milk Chocolate
I’ve been seeing this kind of gimmick around for a while now from various manufacturers – in fact, I even reviewed one last year. I didn’t expect to enjoy it then, and I wasn’t expecting to enjoy this one either.
As you can see, the box looks very similar to Deanna’s dark chocolate version. The only difference being the colour and the silver foil (rather than gold) inside.
The design of the chocolate inside is a bit different though:
The bar smells not unlike Kinder chocolate. It’s 33% cocoa solids, but cocoa butter and whole milk powder are listed as the second and third ingredients (after sugar).
The result is that the bar smells and tastes creamy and sweet. There isn’t a huge amount of chocolatey flavour here, but the overall effect isn’t too bad.
Texture wise, it’s quite glossy and a little waxy and it doesn’t melt in the mouth as readily as a better chocolate. But again, it’s not bad… it’s just not great.
But that still leaves the issue of who exactly would buy it. It’s a novelty gift and nothing more. I’m guessing the recipient of either of these bars isn’t going to go out and buy it again, and I certainly won’t be either.