Bloomsberry Emergency Chocolate
Deanna and I may be on different continents, but we both came across these ‘Emergency Chocolates’ from Bloomsberry at the same time. Deanna picked up the dark version and I found the milk chocolate version. So here’s both our reviews in one handy, pocket-sized emergency post.
Deanna’s Review: Dark Chocolate
I’ve been seeing these little boxes around a lot, but I knew that under the smiling cover, it would be no better than average. Which is sad because it could really be pretty entertaining.
“For immediate relief of: Chocolate Cravings, Lovesickness, Exam Pressure, Mild Anxiety, and Extreme Hunger.”
I let my hopes go up just slightly at the wrapper inside, then started suspiciously eyeing the yellow “gold” wrapper underneath. The twelve big rectangles smell sweet. . . and very unpromising. They taste. . . horrible. That’s really the only word. Hideously sweet in the worst way and synthetic and gross.
Hence the name. You’d only eat it in an emergency when you have no other options. Even then. . . well, I guess it’ll partially satisfy your chocolate cravings if you really are desperate. Trapped under a radioactive bombed city for a score of years. Because there’s no reason I’d pay for the box when the chocolate inside is no good. These people have a wide range, but they’re obviously not putting the attention where it needs to go.
Dom’s Review: Milk Chocolate
I’ve been seeing this kind of gimmick around for a while now from various manufacturers – in fact, I even reviewed one last year. I didn’t expect to enjoy it then, and I wasn’t expecting to enjoy this one either.
As you can see, the box looks very similar to Deanna’s dark chocolate version. The only difference being the colour and the silver foil (rather than gold) inside.
The design of the chocolate inside is a bit different though:
The bar smells not unlike Kinder chocolate. It’s 33% cocoa solids, but cocoa butter and whole milk powder are listed as the second and third ingredients (after sugar).
The result is that the bar smells and tastes creamy and sweet. There isn’t a huge amount of chocolatey flavour here, but the overall effect isn’t too bad.
Texture wise, it’s quite glossy and a little waxy and it doesn’t melt in the mouth as readily as a better chocolate. But again, it’s not bad… it’s just not great.
But that still leaves the issue of who exactly would buy it. It’s a novelty gift and nothing more. I’m guessing the recipient of either of these bars isn’t going to go out and buy it again, and I certainly won’t be either.
Never tried these – and probably won’t. It’s more a novelty gift than proper chocolate. Why would I be bothered with eating such stuff if I can have one of Domori’s single origin chocolate slabs?
I don’t mind the taste of Bloomsberry chocolate at all, and I love the packaging! At least they are innovative in their package designs, if not in any other aspect.
I agree! What we have been offering in the US did not live up to the designs. You may be pleased to hear that for some time now we have been making all of our chocolate for Europe in Switzerland and that we are moving all of of our chocolate making to our one facility in Switzerland so that we can be as hands on with the making of or bars as we are with the design. We tried contracting out in the USA but it hasn’t really worked has it! With our Swiss chocolate makers we now have real confidence as to where our ingredients come from, we can make sure there are no additives etc and as we are all together in one place we can make chocolate for the world that we are as proud of as the boxes they go in. Currently we are making a 75% cocoa Dark, a 3% cocoa Milk and we use the same Milk chocolate to make our Milk chocolate with Hazelnuts- my favourite. We are also working on a Fairtrade/Organics range which we are very excited about.
For Immediate Relief
Scientists at Bloomsberry & Co Have announced what could be the greatest breakthrough in food technology since the invention of Milk Chocolate. The e-mail friendly chocolate bar. Using existing technology platforms they have developed a chocolate bar that can be successfully sent via email. All the recipient will need is a computer (Windows or Mac), a broadband internet connection and a standard ink jet or color laser printer. ‘Finally distance will no longer matter, wherever you are in the world you will be no more than a click away from chocolate” said an overjoyed spokesperson at the recently held press conference. Bloomsberry Scientists have pointed out however that the technology is still very new and is several years away from commercial release. Also there are regulatory hurdles to overcome including FCC and FDA, approvals as well as enhancement of the final product to further improve the consumer experience. ” Currently the emailed chocolate is extremely thin and several of the trial participants have indicated that the taste is closer to that of paper than one usually expects from a conventional chocolate bar, but this is to be expected in the early stages of development. We are working with the major printer ink manufacturers to a develop a more chocolaty taste. They are however proving difficult, as with all new ideas you often meet resistance from conventional thinkers” quoted an unnamed Bloomsberry spokesperson off the record.
For information on this and other life enhancing chocolate innovations go to http://www.bloomsberry.com
It’s good to read that Bloomsberry is paying attention to the quality of the actual product … but we sure were not impressed with our first bar. The very cutely packaged “Marital Bliss Bar” purchased as a valentine tidbit held really, really, poor chocolate. It seemed terribly old, though the Best Before date of 12/10 would seem to indicate it wasn’t. We checked that date after eating our first pieces to see if that explained the awful result. Poor flavour, gravelly texture. It was a real disappointment given the bar’s description copy employing such words as ‘premium, all natural, tantalizing, superior, delectable’ — none were remotely appropriate. Well, it probably is ‘all natural’ but who cares if it tastes that bad.
I wonder if this was some of the American product that Giles says ‘didn’t live up to the designs’; a chocolatier from Switzerland would have been banished from the country for this.
where can i buy this chocolates here in the Philippines?
Wow – This chocolate was gross. Tastes like Easter chocolate! I bought 3 of ‘em on clearance thinkin’ they were the gourmet type I love and did I just find a deal? Nope.
I managed to get 4 squares down before I couldn’t take it anymore and threw the rest to my drunken godson who was also unable to finish it. Nearly an hour later and I still can’t get the yucky chocolate aftertaste out of my mouth. DON’T Buy this stuff!